Let go and Let GOD...

every year I am really excited when it reaches end of July because August is coming.. however, last few weeks i have been busy with lots of things.. preparations.. school... relatives visitation.. till i felt so tired and exhausted every single days.. i felt that i don't have a moment alone for myself.. and even for God.. i pray quickly before and after wake up.. i am too busy with my daily schedule and myself.. then the satan works well in me when i'm busy =( i become ignorant, selfish, easily angered, easily annoyed, etc etc.. so when problems come, I am just defeated.. I am down.. instantly down and sinked...

then i cried.. i cried and cried and cried till i hear God's voice saying, "kneel down my dear and pray out loud." at first I ignored it and keep craying.. but those voice kept coming.. so I kneel down and pray out loud (with crying of course) and immediately my heart at ease.. i feel "plong" =) and i felt comforted by His presence.. I knew my problems are still there.. but I knew I am not alone and God with me... Amazingly, I could sleep well that night (usually with lots tensions and problems, I could not sleep) and wake up with fresh mind..

I knew I have to let those go.. let all my problems.. my burdens.. my issues.. lift them to God's hands.. and Let God in to my daily life.. struggle with God, deliberate with God and decide with God according to His will.. I am glad that I still have Him in my life and I am blessed to be His beloved.. Now, after I lift those in God's hands.. it is my turn now to act and walk with Him..


"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:28-30)

What's Next?!?

wow.. still couldn't believe that my 6 months study will end in 3 weeks.. which means my birthday is coming up soooonn... hehehehehe... well.. during these 6 months lots of things happened.. in one side I am happy that this will end soon because i miss home so much.. the more i far away from home.. the more i miss home and the more i realize nothing beats the comfort of home..

well.. i am also really excited for August.. number one is because my birthday is coming up =) FYI, August is a big month for my family.. because lots of my relatives' birthday are in August.. I am also excited for my parent's silver wedding anniversary... we will celebrate this precious moments with family and close friends only.. and I am really excited about it =)

so many events will happen in this August.. my grandma's b'day.. moving to new apt in SG.. my upcoming b'day... my cousins' b'day.. my parents' b'day and anniversary celebration and my cousin's engagement celebration... hufff.. so many events..

I am really looking forward for August.. but then my study ends.. it means my life has to go on.. and what's next... what's ahead.. what i will do after this.. right now it's still blurry.. because i have many things to do ahead.. after august ends.. september is holiday season.. means san jose time =D

however, i still need to think what i want to do next.. what's after this.. what's ahead..

pray that God will guide me according to His will..

have a blessed nite everyone...

L.O.V.E

yesterday, my dearest phabo, Nananananananananana, wrote on my FB wall.. she said that if I like her status she will wrote me back what she likes, dislikes and loves about me.. also her 1st impression and confession about me..

reading her comments makes me realize how much fun we had in those 4.5 years.. and how much i miss her.. and when I reply her posts.. I was having fun thinking our fun stuff, our stupidness, our crazy moments... it is nice to have someone as caring, nice, kind as her.. she is more than just a friend for me.. she is my sister and she is my role model as well =)

anyway.. later at nite... i ask Hendry to do the same thing.. we comment on each other.. well, we did not post in FB.. we did it privately.. hehehehehehe...

it was harder for me to put words for him.. and he admits the same thing.. at first he only wanted to comment on likes and loves part only.. but later we did all of it.. it was fun.. it was honest.. it was us...

this morning when i wake up.. suddenly my mind thought: what would God likes, dislikes, loves about me.. and what His impression and confession on me.. hmmmm.... i think i saddened HIM more =(

These past days.. my relatives visited SG and stayed in my place.. to be honest.. I am kinda annoyed of their presence.. when i shared with my mom.. she just simply said: be humble and be available.. do what Martha do (serving others) with Maria's heart.. honestly it's not easy.. because I annoyed easily and when I annoyed I will be annoying too =( and I don't like that.. and I have been struggling with that these past few days.. every day and nite, I prayed that GOD guide my attitude towards them.. many times I could but others time i lose it..

and this morning God said: it does not matter, because My Love to you is everlasting and unconditionally.. Love one another as you love Me.. don't be selfish and arrogant.. yet.. be humble and kind.. Be Martha with Maria's heart as my mom said... and the key is LOVE.. so I just remind myself: My God loves me unconditionally so I also should LOVE them despite their attitude towards me.. it's not easy but i think it works

and immediately this verse pops up in my mind:

"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." (1 Corinthians 13:13)


so hope it will be blessing for you...

Down but Not Out

Previous weeks were my hardest time ever... I hit my lowest point once again.. and just felt helpless... Thank GOD for His gracious words and guidance.. I was reminded once again that I might have been down and screwed but I am not out because I am His beloved and I am precious in His sight.. Thank you Jesus.. Please forgive me for my selfishness..

Just want to share this one..

Hope you all are blessed like I do.. and stay tune for more posts =)

2 Corinthians 4:8–9

8We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; 9persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed…

Before you were a Christian, when something sad or bad happened to you, you cried until you had no more tears left. Your heart simply broke into pieces, and you felt trapped, depressed and totally defeated.

But after having become a Christian, when something bad happens to you, you may still cry, but you feel comforted inside. You are sad outwardly, but your heart isn’t heavy. You don’t understand why, but deep down inside you, there is something lifting you up. That something buoyant, which is rising from the inside of you, is the life of Christ in you!

You cannot be completely distressed because Christ in you is the Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6) who says to you, “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” (John 14:27)

Yes, it may be a bad situation and you are in a tight spot, but Christ in you is the way, the truth and the life (John 14:6), and He says to you, “It will all be all right. I will provide a way out for you.”

You know you are not defeated because Christ in you is your victory (1 Corinthians 15:57) and He says to you, “You are not fighting for victory, but fighting from victory because you already have the victory in Me.”

Before you knew Christ, when you were down, you were out. But now, when you are down, you are not out because Christ in you is the hope of glory. (Colossians 1:27) “Hope” in the Bible means a definite, positive expectation of good.

So Christ in you is the definite, positive expectation of a glorious marriage! Christ in you is the definite, positive expectation of a glorious family! Christ in you is the definite positive expectation of glorious health! Christ in you is the definite positive expectation of a glorious life!

My friend, Christ in you is the definite, positive expectation of all the glories of God revealed to you. No bad circumstance that you are in can or will ever cause you to be destroyed or forsaken by God!